A pair of testicles in a slingshot would pa-doing away, then return to their owner, under duress of the elasticity of the scrotum.

I can't tell you what this page is. I believe it defies classification, in the traditional sense. I guess it could be considered a "human adventure". Or perhaps a psychological analysis. This page and everything within it is an element of my life, for eight hours or more every day. I used to live this. Now I observe it casually.

I can, however, tell you quite simply what this is NOT.
It is not a guide to The Internet, or any aspect of the technology used for accessing or creating any part of The Internet.
It is not a guide to chat, IRC, online messaging.
It is not the digital equivalent of "How To Make Friends And Influence People".
And it's not a self help guide.

I've spent hours each day existing in an online environment and interacting with online acquaintances for the past three and a half years. Before I bought my first modem, I was warned to be careful of all of the "bad things" on The Internet. Porn. Scams. Porn scams. Rapists. Maniacal axe murderers posing as chatters. All of the above. Don't get me wrong. These threats exist, by all means. I could relay several "horror stories" of people who have met each other and arrived at suitably grisly ends. However, the chances of any of this happening to youis directly proportional to your letting it. There's another dark side to The Internet. It's a side that people don't immediately think of when they consider the vast information transfer network that we've built ourselves. It's a dark side that most people either remain blissfully unaware of, or discover only after several years of exposure to an online community.

Addiction. Anonymity. Simplicity. Gullibility. All of these things combine to lapse the user into a psychological disorder they're totally oblivious to.

I guess my hope for this text is that I can wake people up to this phenomena before they become consumed by it themselves. I'm not here to put people off The Internet. In fact, I promote The Internet, and I even promote online communities. I just have hope that someone will read this, and think twice before forgetting to read between the online lines.

"I am not addicted to the 'net. I can't even remember the last time I visited a website. I'm addicted to the people I know in chat. The people on my friends list. If I'm addicted to anything, that's what it is. (Surely it's not an unhealthy addiction.)"

- Russ Gawthorpe. Three years ago.

Contents:
Proposed Chapter List
Online Sociology
Cybersex







All content is © Russell Gawthorpe, 2003 and all subsequent years, including this one, and probably the next one, unless otherwise credited. Don't steal my shit.

This page was generated in a can of soup.

CAUTION: Do not ingest this website. Deliberate concentration and inhalation of this website can be harmful and fatal, and probably won't do your self esteem any favours. This website takes no responsibility for the development of acne, canker sores or any kind of rash, boils or undue lumps in the rectal/anal/buttockal region.

This webpage best viewed with a monitor lizard that makes a really low, bassy growl when angry. A web browser is recommended, but may cause cancer.

Some random words to make the search engines freak out:
Ornithoid Libido Snatching! Rachmaninoff Concerto Manipulation! Anal Dwelling! Nearly Not The Last Artichoke! No Drilling Spaniards! Speak Of The Cucumber! Microphone Is The Language Of Sauce! Never The Main Femur!